i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
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