Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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