so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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