What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
