No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
