I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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