Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
