Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
