He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
