you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
