Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
