she was so not down for the gang bang
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
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