My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize