I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
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