Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
This is the high leading the old right now
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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