my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
