NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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