so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I think I have vodka in my lungs
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
