You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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