Well apparently he's into motor boating.
You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
