I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
