David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
