she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
