dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
