U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
