There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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