if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
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