Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
