yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
