if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
