My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Randomize
