i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
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