i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.�
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
