glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
