Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
