I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
