does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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