His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
she smelled like a LAN party
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
