That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
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