I think I just saw someone hide a body.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!�
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
