A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
