He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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