we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
