He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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