what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Randomize
