he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
