enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
