Say something about gay babies.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
How naked do you want me to be?
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
