Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
