I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
