And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
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